"It was mentioned on CNN that the new prime number discovered recently is four times bigger than the previous record." — John Blasik
This was compiled from different postings to rec.humor.
Hmmm, by the way, did you know that 1 is not prime ?
How to prove that all odd numbers are prime ?
Well, this problem has different solutions whether you are a:
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, and by induction we have that all the odd integers are prime.
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is an experimental error...
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime...
3 is prime, 5 is prime... hey, let's publish!
Modern physicist using renormalization:
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is ... 9/3 is prime, 11 is prime, 13 is prime, 15 is ... 15/3 is prime, 17 is prime, 19 is prime, 21 is ... 21/3 is prime...
All numbers are equally prime and non-prime until observed.
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, and the rest are left as an exercise for the student.
Left: The Ishango bones, maybe the first compilation of prime numbers ever.
Let p be any prime number larger than 2. Then p is not divisible by 2, so p is odd. QED
There are exactly as many odd numbers as primes (Euclid, Cantor), and exactly one even prime (namely 2), so there must be exactly one odd nonprime (namely 1).
3 is prime, yes it is true....
10 is prime, 11 is prime, 101 is prime...
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 will be fixed in the next release, ...
03 is prime, 05 is prime, 07 is prime, 09 is really 011 which everyone knows is prime, ...
What's a prime?
What's an odd number?
3 is prime. Wait...
Now why would anyone want to know about that? That's not user friendly. You don't worry about it, we'll take care of it for you.
1. No one will ever need any more than 3.
ZX-81 Computer Programmer:
3 is prime, Out of Memory.
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 8.9999978 is prime...
usage: prime [-nV] [--quiet] [--silent] [--version] [-e script] --catenate --concatenate | c --create | d --diff --compare | r --append | t --list | u --update | x -extract --get [ --atime-preserve ] [ -b, --block-size N ] [ -B, --read-full-blocks ] [ -C, --directory DIR ] [--checkpoint ] [ -f, --file [HOSTNAME:]F ] [ --force-local ] [ -F, --info-script F --new-volume-script F ] [-G, --incremental ] [ -g, --listed-incremental F ] [ -h, --dereference ] [ -i, --ignore-zeros ] [ --ignore-failed-read ] [ -k, --keep-old-files ] [ -K, --starting-file F ] [ -l, --one-file-system ] [ -L, --tape-length N ] [ -m, --modification-time ] [ -M, --multi-volume ] [ -N, --after-date DATE, --newer DATE ] [ -o, --old-archive, --portability ] [ -O, --to-stdout ] [ -p, --same-permissions, --preserve-permissions ] [ -P, --absolute-paths ] [ --preserve ] [ -R, --record-number ] [ [-f script-file] [--expression=script] [--file=script-file] [file...]
prime: you must specify exactly one of the r, c, t, x, or d options
For more information, type "prime --help''
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, ...
Segmentation fault, Core dumped.
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, 9 is prime, 9 is prime, 9 is ...
Oops, let's try that again:
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is ... 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is ... 3 is ... Um, right. Okay, how about this:
3 is not prime, 5 is not prime, 7 is not prime, 9 is not prime... So much for the beta releases. Ship this:
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is a feature, 11 is prime... and put on the cover "More prime numbers than anyone else in the industry !"
3 is a prime, 4 is a feature, 5 is a prime, 6 is a feature, 7 is a prime, 8 is not yet implemented, 9 is our backwards compatibility module, ...
3 is an odd prime, 5 is an odd prime, 7 is an odd prime, 9 is a very odd prime, ...
Software tech support operator:
Well, we haven't had any reports of composite odd numbers... do you have the latest version of ZFC?
1 is green, 2 is blue, 3 is orange, 4 is red...
Hypothesis: All odd numbers are prime
If a proof exists, then the hypothesis must be true
The proof exists; you're reading it now.
From 1 and 2 follows that all odd numbers are prime
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 aaah. I can make 9 a prime.
Why don't we just call all the odd numbers prime and call all the prime numbers odd, that way all the odd numbers would be prime
3 is prime. Hum, that's an interesting statement, I'll get one of my research students to look into that.
Assume 9 is prime...
2 is a prime, 4 is a prime.
2 is even, 4 is even, 6 is even...
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is not prime. Look, the prime rate is dropping.
100% of the sample 5, 13, 37, 41 and 53 is prime, so all odd numbers must be prime.
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is an outlier, 11 is prime, 13 is prime...
What's a prime number ?
What's a number ?
It depends on what the meaning of is is.
What is ?
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is... Who can I delegate this to ?
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, although there appears to be prima facie evidence that 9 is not prime, there exists substantial precedent to indicate that nine should be considered prime. The following brief presents the case for nine's primeness ...
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, and with 9 you get five excellent primes for the price of three !
Prime or not, every number is unique. Take 9 for example...
The fact that nine is not prime indicates a deprived cultural environment which can only be remedied by a federally funded cultural enrichment program.
What's nine got against being prime? I'll bet it won't allow the pledge of allegiance to be said in our schools either.
Put nine on the enemies list. I'm gonna get that number.
3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is ... NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS!
3 is prime, 3 is prime, 3 is prime, 3 is prime
"You know what seems odd to me ? Numbers that aren't divisible by two." — Michael Wolf.